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Personal Growth is Not Linear

Kamilah MS

I’ve been in the training and personal growth industry long enough and have worked with so many people to let you know that personal growth is non-linear. Meaning, you will go through ups and downs as you normally would in life and it will be amplified because you now have a new sense of awareness.

Some people say ignorance is bliss so they may live a life of being in a state of unconsciousness; meaning, they operate from survival or they may live in denial so that they need not have to be responsible for what shows up in their lives and for the conscious or unconscious choices they make. It does take courage to look at ourselves in the mirror to see the things we are avoiding, such as our destructive habits and behaviours, and I am not judging if anyone continues to live this way because no one wants to live this way, usually, for a mentally healthy person, it is because they are not able to see a way out yet to make a shift that could tremendously alter their lives for the better. My coach Calvin Coyles said that when someone is given the right knowledge, opportunity and environment, that person can change. 

Living a life of survival may look like wanting to be tucked away from being seen so that no one would know that we live a life full of shame, regrets, guilt and mistakes. It may also look like having brains and brawn or fame, status, looks and money to hide our feeling of worthlessness. Sometimes it can also look like being in constant aggression and looking fierce or bold to hide insecurities and imperfections. I have experienced all of these modes of survival myself. I am human too and these are blind spots that usually hinder our personal growth.

Even when it’s being pointed out, when we are unconscious, we would not know that we are a walking unconscious living person. That’s why it takes self-awareness, personal growth and self-mastery to uncover these layers that hide our true selves.

Now you can see why personal growth is not linear. It can be ugly, messy and confronting. Why do I say this when I’m offering life coaching? Won’t I be scaring my clients away?

I am not concerned by this because when someone chooses to embark on personal growth, that is the first layer of awareness, to notice that they have been living a life that does not fulfil them and they tell themselves with certainty that they want to let go of old patterns and habits to live a life of purpose and meaning, basically to be happy and fulfilled. They are aware of the implications and impact of living in survival mode all their lives.

They would be willing to uncover layer by layer, the self-sabotaging behaviours, their attachments, their pride, ego, fears and more.

Self-discovery is an ongoing journey and it is a rewarding one. It is like climbing the highest mountain and when you get to the peak you get to have a view that not many people get to see. Are you willing to climb that mountain and see the beauty that resides within you?

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K Self-Mastery strives to create awareness and promote self-discovery and support others to discover the existence of practical, individual, creative yet unifying and effective practices that promotes love, kindness, compassion, forgiveness, gratitude and wellness to the world.

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