In my book, I will define what is the definition of happiness. I am writing this post to list down some of the traits and characteristics which are identifiable in happy moms.
Happy moms tend to have the following traits and characteristics, can you identify any one of these traits in yourself?
#1 She Does Not Need a Man to Make Her Happy
It is a bold statement, but please do understand that this does not mean that she does not need a man at all. Happy moms need a man for many other aspects such as being a support, partner, companion and of course for sex.
However, she knows that happiness comes from within and no man or other beings could rob her happiness.
In my case, I know that my happiness does not come from being pampered with gifts and lovely treats from my husband.
My happiness is my own definition is to be happy for my children and basically living a healthy, spiritual and minimalist lifestyle is my kind of happiness.
Of course, it would be ideal to have a man who supports your notion of happiness but remember, happiness is attainable with or without a man.
#2 She Can Speak Her Mind
A happy mom can speak up and voice up to her opinions without worrying about how her opinions will be perceived by others.
Being silent for matters that means a lot to her is not an option. In my case, I am very vocal when it comes to raising my own children the way I want to raise them and if any adults around them went against my values and principals that I have subscribed for my children, I would speak up and share my thoughts no matter the hierarchy in a family, rank or age group.
Some may find it rude to go against eldest, for example, voicing up against the kind of food being served to my children.
I had voiced up my disapproval and thought to my children’s school teachers at the time when student bullies were not handled.
I had also shared my thoughts with my husband and my children’s grandparents on how I’d prefer my children to be treated.
To me, it is called taking ownership and responsibility for my children.
#3 She Knows Herself Well
A happy mom knows who she is. She knows her own demons, her own ideas, her own limitations, her health, and her thresholds.
Initially, she would have spent most of her life making mistakes and learning from them through understanding her own thoughts and behaviors. She is always willing to explore and understand herself better.
Self-awareness leads to inner peace and happiness and she is unshaken by what others think of her because she knows very well that others do not know her as much as she knows herself.
In my book, I will share how you can create self-awareness and how you can break your own barriers and old habits. You will be surprised that once you have self-awareness you will begin to relate with another person a lot better.
#4 She Loves Herself
She is not the kind of woman who would sacrifice her own happiness so others could be happy. I call that stupidity. Why suffer just to make others happy?
Happiness should always be a two-way street. When you are happy others are happy and when others are happy you are even more happier. Happiness should not rob happiness from another.
Believe me, when you focus on loving yourself first before loving others, you will naturally love others the same way as to how you love yourself. For example, if you love your body and take care of your health first, you will naturally want others around you to do the same too.
Back to stupidity, an example of utter stupidity is to be in a toxic relationship where you lost your values and purpose. You decided to stay and put up with another person’s attitude so that he/she could be happy. Many who chose to be in this situation said that they were simply being patient.
Well if so, being patient does not have to mean sacrificing your own sanity and happiness. Today’s definition of being patient is often underrated, unappealing and dis-empowering. If chaos e.g. abuse, sufferings, and harm are the outcome of patience, that is NOT patience; that is call endurance and tolerating bad behaviors either from yourself or others! The patient does not apply when you have choices.
Love yourself first, break yourself away from harm, take a break, sabbatical or a retreat from any negative situation you are in just to recharge and recover to regain self-love.
#5 She Avoids Making Unnecessary Mistakes
Don’t get me wrong, happy moms do make mistakes from time to time, but most of the time she makes responsible, matured and wise decision to not upset the balance of her life.
In my case, I have done my very best to abide by the rules and regulations of my country like clearing my own trash. I mix around with positive and like-minded people.
I operate with integrity in most of my day to day operations. For example, if my husband entrusted me to take care of the groceries at home, I will not spend it on something else. If my sister who is also my business partner, expected me to complete certain tasks for our business, I will do so. If my brother asked me for help, I will ensure that I get it done.
Simple things that I do will go a long way.
#6 Having Less Worries
At this stage, I notice that I have stopped worrying about the future. It took me a lot of mental conditioning on my end to reduce my level of worry. I still do worry about some matters but not to the extent of being anxious and panicky and the matters I’d worry about nowadays are often really trivial such as thinking about any backlogs at homes like laundry or cooking and could easily be dismissed.
I no longer worry about the what-ifs and I no longer worry about my circumstances. I tend to deal with them one bite-size at a time instead of spending too much time contemplating in worries and what-ifs. It is best to go along with the flow of life and not against it.
I do sometimes vent and share my thoughts and feelings with my sister just to let out steam and express myself. I realize, us women need to talk and express ourselves and most often than not, I cannot hold back my thoughts and feelings to myself.
It is definitely OK and healthy to share your thoughts and feelings with someone whom you can trust to listen without judgment. Don’t keep things to yourself.
There you go, some traits and attributes of a happy mom! Which one can you relate to the most?
Leave a Reply