I was exposed to positivity through the motivational camps or programs that I went to and from the books I’ve had read since I was a teenager.
Positivity brought me to where I am today. I can experience inner peace in my day to day life no matter my challenges.
After my first job at the National University of Singapore, I went into the financial industry where I was exposed to a lot of motivational talks and training to help the sales force be at the right mindset to achieve our goals in our career while helping our clients.
I had a fair share of exposure in the multilevel marketing business and attended their training and events.
Most of it was superfluous in my experience. There was no meat but a lot of hype. The few programs or training and books I read did turn my life around and I began to have deeper insights and understanding about myself and as I dwell deeper into recognising who I am, I began to truly understand why positivity when done right, will make a huge impact to not only our mental health but also every aspect of our lives such as spirituality, physical health, relationships, career, family, home environment and more.
I have concluded that positivity is like a natural medicine for our hearts and our mind and it is charged with healing energy too. Furthermore, psychologists have established the field of positive psychology and found more and more scientific evidence of the benefits of being positive. Look up renowned psychologist, Martin Seligman.
What do I mean by doing it right?
Here are a few tips on how you can kick start your journey towards positivity:
1- Practice meditation. 5 minutes a day is a good start. Meditation can help you have a new level of awareness about what’s going on with your mind, body and soul. Without awareness, it would be challenging to address our thoughts and behaviours.
2- Be kind to yourself and treat yourself with gentleness.
Yes, two important tips are simple, yet many struggles to do them consistently.
I discussed this topic with member’s of my K Mummy’s Focus group and I gathered the following insights from the discussion.
I asked them to define positivity and they came up with the following definitions:
1- Acceptance, finding the silver lining and being worry-free.
She gave her example about waking up late and instead of blaming herself or make herself feel bad about it, she would learn from it and not do it again.
Each time when we blame ourselves, it would make us feel horrible about ourselves and we might end up in a bad mood for the entire day.
2- Failure is not negativity and something to be fearful of. Failure is a way for us to learn. Positivity is about accepting shortcomings. As nobody is perfect.
This mummy shared how she is no longer feeling afraid of making mistakes and she is more forgiving and compassionate when others make mistakes.
3- Positive People seems to be more confident.
I find that this is an interesting and spot-on observation from the mummy who shared this. When you come to think of it, most people who have a positive mindset and positive outlook in life tend to show up confident.
I can confirm from my experience that now that I am a more positive person, I do feel a lot more confident about myself, my actions and my life.
My late mom too became more confident, cheery, joyful and bubbly when she practised positivity.
It is a far cry from when we were both angsty, moody and lacking confidence.
4- Being positive will affect our daily life and being able to stay positive is the key to solving many problems. Positivity requires focus.
This mummy shared a great point. Yes, what you focus on you become.
Amid distractions and negativity surrounding us, how can we stay focus and be steadfast in our practice towards positivity?
It is true that when we are positive, it can help us solve many problems in life because positivity helps calm our nervous system and when we are calm we would be able to engage the prefrontal cortex of our brain to be able to make executive decisions in our lives.
As for focus, go back to the first two essential practices I shared at the beginning of this blog post. Of course, there are more tips but I cannot emphasise more how important it is to be practice being aware of ourselves and treating ourselves with kindness.
5- Positivity helps me to gain clarity for myself and makes me feel happy and determine to be successful.
Yes, I cannot agree more. I too find clarity when I look at things or situations in a positive light. It shifts our attention to problem-solving mode and it makes taking action forward effortless.
I then asked mummies the following question,
Q: How do you practice positivity in your day to day life?
One mummy shared that every morning without fail or whenever she looks into the mirror, she would have a positive chat with herself.
I used to be someone who did not like to look at myself in the mirror and when I began practising saying a prayer taught to me as a Muslim, I began to see subtle shifts as to how I began to relate to myself.
“O Allah, You have beautified my body, so beautify my character”
Another mummy shared that she practice acceptance. Being able to accept what had taken place, past mistakes and outcomes as well as accepting herself and those around her.
This is a powerful practice because we are not trying to alter what already is but we can take actions forward towards an outcome and experience that we want every moment in our lives.
As an advocate of inner peace, I am mindful of not trying to force a change or outcome and allow situations to unravel themselves after doing what I can to the best of my knowledge and ability every moment. Most outcomes no longer surprise me because life is like the law of physics. Take the right effort with the right amount of energy you get to see results immediately or for the long term.
You reap what you sow.
One mummy shared that she’s been practising positivity with her son because previously she viewed him as being stubborn. Yes, how you view others will have an impact on the kind of relationship you get with another person. For example, if you view someone as stubborn, you would tend to feel hopeless around the person, when you shift how you view that same person, you would begin to take new actions with the person moving forward.
Another mummy shared that she’s inspired by one of our members who consistently shared affirmations in our WhatsApp group. She’s since started writing a gratitude journal and she starts her day with a positive note.
This is why we need focus groups, we are social creatures and what we see we tend to copy. Think about it, it is the same as what is trending online, many would want to ride along with the wave. Instead of blindly following random fads, might as well be in a focus group where everyone is up to accomplishing the same focused mission, in this case, self-mastery and positivity.
At the end of the discussion, the mummies shared why positivity is important.
Positivity gives us the strength to leap forward and not give up easily. When we do not dwell on unnecessary stuff such as celebrity gossip and news from across the world, we can gain clarity and focus on ourselves to keep improving and progressing. Positivity keeps us focused on our goals and can help us be a confident person too.
There you go, our humble sharing on positivity. What do you think about positivity?
Join our next K Mummy’s Focus group.